Well I'm really excited to report that last night in my AA meeting, I SHARED. I was so scared, and I don't know why. I had spent Sunday getting to know everyone there, and they were all really awesome people...Not scary or intimidating at all... I guess in a way I think that somehow I don't deserve to speak up, that what I have to say isn't as important as what someone else could say. But I learned that my thought has no truth to it. There have been things that people have said that made light bulbs go off for me, and I realized that I very well could be holding the switch for someone else. Ive done 2 meetings a day so far and I think I'm going to try really hard to stick with 2 for as long as I can. The other awesome thing that I love, is that its almost like a 24 hour meeting. There are 5-6 meetings a day but in between there is open chat, which is almost like having a group of sponsors at your disposal. I pray that this really helps me and opens my eyes. I would love nothing more than after my year of forced sobriety that I WANT to STAY sober. I just know that if I start drinking again I'm going to end up the same way I always do, and I really don't like that part of me.
Well just wanted to get that off my mind, through my fingers, and onto my virtual paper.
Ill be back!
3 days down and sober thoughts, Rachel
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